Their wives likewise must be dignified, not slanderers, but sober-minded, faithful in all things.
1 Timothy 3:11
Truth be told, 1 Timothy 3:11 is a list of qualities that must be observed in a woman before her husband is ordained as a deacon, not instructions on how to behave after his ordination.
I have struggled here, because I am not perfect. My husband had "deacon" written all over him; it was his wife's character, I feared, that threatened to disqualify him. Our pastor and I assured Henry that in spite of his doubts, he was more than qualified. Later, our pastor and my husband turned and did the same for me. I remained doubtful, but I was not willing to let my lack of self-confidence hold my husband back from something God had so clearly called him to do. It took me some time to realize that if God called my husband, it meant He had called me as well.
We passed our 'testing phase' in spite of our weaknesses. Throughout this time it was never any secret that we are imperfect, so we both felt confident enough with our "passing grade" to submit ourselves to what we believed was God's will. Next thing we knew, Henry was a 26-year-old deacon.
It is true that I desire deeply to be a woman of God who is respectful, trustworthy, and full of faith. This is a high standard to live up to. I have certainly not “arrived.” Before Henry's ordination, I renewed my commitment to God and vowed to take His commands seriously, but during the ceremony, I still felt the weight of what he was (we were) signing up for and the depth of what he (we) had been called to do. That was 9 months ago, and even in this short time-frame I have already messed up plenty of times. This one verse is a humbling thing, that's for sure. No indeed, I have certainly not "arrived." I'm still shaking in my boots.
Honestly, this one verse is so humbling that I hesitated to even start this blog. I have especially struggled to write my next entry...
I am writing a series in which I plan to elaborate on each quality a woman must have as a deacon's wife, according to 1 Timothy 3:11. The first post was called "She Must Be Dignified." The next post is going to focus on "not slanderers." I have been procrastinating on this one, because when the apostle Paul equates gossiping women with devils... let's just say things could get heavy.
Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth.
2 Timothy 2:15
Encouragement for Deacon's Wives... Or Any Woman of God Striving to Be "Faithful In All Things"
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Why We Can Trust God
Trusting God instead of giving way to fear is not always easy! I'm not perfect at doing this, either.
The very bottom line is that NOTHING can touch our souls, only God can. We can trust Him because He is the lover of our soul, and cares for us! Our homes, health, way of life, everything can be touched by the world (and even then, only if God allows it) but God never allows anyone or anything access to our very soul, because we are HIS.
That applies to everyone in our lives, too! He is the lover of their soul as well. We don't need to fear for ourselves OR anyone else in our lives.
The fact that God sent His very own son, Jesus, to die on our behalf, is proof of His trustworthiness.
The very bottom line is that NOTHING can touch our souls, only God can. We can trust Him because He is the lover of our soul, and cares for us! Our homes, health, way of life, everything can be touched by the world (and even then, only if God allows it) but God never allows anyone or anything access to our very soul, because we are HIS.
That applies to everyone in our lives, too! He is the lover of their soul as well. We don't need to fear for ourselves OR anyone else in our lives.
The fact that God sent His very own son, Jesus, to die on our behalf, is proof of His trustworthiness.
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
Repentance
Repentance looks very different from person to person. Sin is sin, period. But only God knows what is in my heart and yours. It is always about our motivation.
For example:
If I bake you a cake because I love you and want to show you kindness, and I truly expect nothing in return from you (not even your appreciation), it's an act of love.
If I bake you a cake because I am desperate for your approval and I hope I can win your affection by pleasing you, then it is a self-serving act of idol-worship. That's not an overstatement.
If I bake you a cake because I want to make you feel like you owe me something in return, it is now a self-serving act of manipulation and control.
Thinking about this made me consider how often we comment on each other's spiritual maturity based on the fruit that we think we see. I realized that I should probably keep my "diagnosis" of somebody else's growth to myself, because I probably don't know what I am talking about!
Repentance looks different for everyone.
If a woman is usually a doormat, it may be that God truly wants her to speak up when the group is making a decision about where to eat. For her to politely say, "No, I don't want to eat at that restaurant" may actually be a difficult thing for her to do. To an outside observer, it may seem like nothing, but her action would please God if it was from a heart that trusted Him and obeyed Him. God would smile on her decision to make a change in her behavior in order to grow into the confident woman of God He wants her to be!
If a woman who is always bossing people around and making sure everyone knows her opinion was in the same conversation, God might prompt her to keep quiet and let somebody else decide where to eat. What if she ignored Him and decided to politely say, "No, I don't want to eat at that restaurant" anyway? God not be pleased at her decision, because she chose to serve herself instead of obey Him.
Their outward action was the same, but God can see their hearts. One of them submitted to Him; one of them sinned against Him. We wouldn't be able to accurately judge, based on what we saw or heard, what was in the heart of each woman. Only El Roi, the God who sees, can do that.
I'm not your Holy Spirit. It really bugs me when people try to be mine. As a deacon's wife, I'm in a position where I may be judged more quickly by outside observers. I am not a stranger to hearing what somebody thinks I have done wrong, or what they think I should do now. I've been told to stop trying to run from my past, only to turn around and hear that I need to stop living in the past. It's really up to God and me, what I do with my memories and my past. It is healthy to reflect on where you have been, the choices you have made, and the way people in your life have treated you. Then, at some point, it is healthy to move on. God knows when we get to that point, and God will walk each of us through that experience.
It is really a "rule of thumb" we can apply to anything. Baking cakes, eating lunch with friends, or meditating on our lives.... our motivation is what matters to God, and He is the only one who knows our motivation.
1 Samuel 16:7
But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
Matthew 7:1-5
Do not judge so that you will not be judged. For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
Luke 6:37
Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Pardon, and you will be pardoned.
For example:
If I bake you a cake because I love you and want to show you kindness, and I truly expect nothing in return from you (not even your appreciation), it's an act of love.
If I bake you a cake because I am desperate for your approval and I hope I can win your affection by pleasing you, then it is a self-serving act of idol-worship. That's not an overstatement.
If I bake you a cake because I want to make you feel like you owe me something in return, it is now a self-serving act of manipulation and control.
Thinking about this made me consider how often we comment on each other's spiritual maturity based on the fruit that we think we see. I realized that I should probably keep my "diagnosis" of somebody else's growth to myself, because I probably don't know what I am talking about!
Repentance looks different for everyone.
If a woman is usually a doormat, it may be that God truly wants her to speak up when the group is making a decision about where to eat. For her to politely say, "No, I don't want to eat at that restaurant" may actually be a difficult thing for her to do. To an outside observer, it may seem like nothing, but her action would please God if it was from a heart that trusted Him and obeyed Him. God would smile on her decision to make a change in her behavior in order to grow into the confident woman of God He wants her to be!
If a woman who is always bossing people around and making sure everyone knows her opinion was in the same conversation, God might prompt her to keep quiet and let somebody else decide where to eat. What if she ignored Him and decided to politely say, "No, I don't want to eat at that restaurant" anyway? God not be pleased at her decision, because she chose to serve herself instead of obey Him.
Their outward action was the same, but God can see their hearts. One of them submitted to Him; one of them sinned against Him. We wouldn't be able to accurately judge, based on what we saw or heard, what was in the heart of each woman. Only El Roi, the God who sees, can do that.
I'm not your Holy Spirit. It really bugs me when people try to be mine. As a deacon's wife, I'm in a position where I may be judged more quickly by outside observers. I am not a stranger to hearing what somebody thinks I have done wrong, or what they think I should do now. I've been told to stop trying to run from my past, only to turn around and hear that I need to stop living in the past. It's really up to God and me, what I do with my memories and my past. It is healthy to reflect on where you have been, the choices you have made, and the way people in your life have treated you. Then, at some point, it is healthy to move on. God knows when we get to that point, and God will walk each of us through that experience.
It is really a "rule of thumb" we can apply to anything. Baking cakes, eating lunch with friends, or meditating on our lives.... our motivation is what matters to God, and He is the only one who knows our motivation.
1 Samuel 16:7
But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
Matthew 7:1-5
Do not judge so that you will not be judged. For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
Luke 6:37
Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Pardon, and you will be pardoned.
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Praying To Our Father
God is our Heavenly Father. So if you see some kids who love their daddy, want to talk to him, and enjoy being around him, there you go. Prayer is a lot like that. It doesn't have to be so complicated.
I don't have to say things over and over. I don't have to pray in a certain, special order.
I don't have to sit, stand, or kneel a certain way...
I just talk to Dad.
Cry to Dad. Laugh with Dad. Complain to Dad. Ask Dad for help. Thank Dad. Tell Dad I'm sorry. LOVE MY DAD.
I'm His child. He loves me. He made me His. It's a done deal.
He will not disown me if I pray while I'm sitting instead of kneeling. He will not disown me if I come to Him with my bad attitude, especially since He already knows I can only fix it with His help. He will not disown my if I pray in a different order than somebody else does.
He will teach me. He will gently guide me. And when needed, He will chastise me. (Proverbs 3:12, "For whom the LORD loves He reproves, even as a father corrects the son in whom he delights.")
He made us all different, and He loves us all immensely! He knows each of us inside and out, and He has called us all by name. He doesn't need Sally to pray like Jessica. It doesn't please Him if Deacon's-wife-Jan tries her best to pray more like Pastor's-wife-Alice. He wants to fellowship with Jan-being-herself-Jan. He wants to talk to one Harold and one Michael, not one Michael and one Harold-trying-to-be-Michael.
Your Father in Heaven loves you. He made you you. Just talk to Him.
I understand why people get caught up in explaining how to pray... some people think God is a vending machine, some people think God only hears them if they pray a certain prayer with certain words, some people think if they say x then God is required to answer with y... but none of those are true. There is no "formula" to prayer, because it's not a way to manipulate and control God. It's how we communicate with God.
The truth is, all of the lessons on How To Pray are important. The most important lesson of all, though, is to know God loves you and wants a relationship with you. This can only be accomplished through the finished work of His son Jesus Christ, but once you accept Jesus as Savior and Lord... God is your Father. Period.
He's a Father who loves you, a Father who will reprove you when you need it, and a Father who rejoices over you with singing. (Zephaniah 3:17) You don't have to have it all figured out on the first day. The BEST thing you can do, is talk to Him. The WORST thing you can do is stop talking to Him because you're scared you're doing it wrong.
He's Dad. He loves you. Talk to Him.
Then listen to how He responds through His Spirit dwelling within you and through His Holy Word. <3
Jesus said we could call God "Daddy" so that's what I do. (Matthew 6:9, "Pray, then, in this way: 'Our Father...'" See also, Romans 8:15.)
I don't have to say things over and over. I don't have to pray in a certain, special order.
I don't have to sit, stand, or kneel a certain way...
I just talk to Dad.
Cry to Dad. Laugh with Dad. Complain to Dad. Ask Dad for help. Thank Dad. Tell Dad I'm sorry. LOVE MY DAD.
I'm His child. He loves me. He made me His. It's a done deal.
He will not disown me if I pray while I'm sitting instead of kneeling. He will not disown me if I come to Him with my bad attitude, especially since He already knows I can only fix it with His help. He will not disown my if I pray in a different order than somebody else does.
He will teach me. He will gently guide me. And when needed, He will chastise me. (Proverbs 3:12, "For whom the LORD loves He reproves, even as a father corrects the son in whom he delights.")
He made us all different, and He loves us all immensely! He knows each of us inside and out, and He has called us all by name. He doesn't need Sally to pray like Jessica. It doesn't please Him if Deacon's-wife-Jan tries her best to pray more like Pastor's-wife-Alice. He wants to fellowship with Jan-being-herself-Jan. He wants to talk to one Harold and one Michael, not one Michael and one Harold-trying-to-be-Michael.
Your Father in Heaven loves you. He made you you. Just talk to Him.
I understand why people get caught up in explaining how to pray... some people think God is a vending machine, some people think God only hears them if they pray a certain prayer with certain words, some people think if they say x then God is required to answer with y... but none of those are true. There is no "formula" to prayer, because it's not a way to manipulate and control God. It's how we communicate with God.
The truth is, all of the lessons on How To Pray are important. The most important lesson of all, though, is to know God loves you and wants a relationship with you. This can only be accomplished through the finished work of His son Jesus Christ, but once you accept Jesus as Savior and Lord... God is your Father. Period.
He's a Father who loves you, a Father who will reprove you when you need it, and a Father who rejoices over you with singing. (Zephaniah 3:17) You don't have to have it all figured out on the first day. The BEST thing you can do, is talk to Him. The WORST thing you can do is stop talking to Him because you're scared you're doing it wrong.
He's Dad. He loves you. Talk to Him.
Then listen to how He responds through His Spirit dwelling within you and through His Holy Word. <3
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
1 Timothy 3:11- She Must Be Dignified
Their wives likewise must be dignified, not slanderers, but sober-minded, faithful in all things.
1 Timothy 3:11
I'm going to take a few blog posts to break this verse down. My plan is to fully meditate on each quality I must have as a deacon's wife in order to grow in each of these areas. To start, I am going to make sure I fully understand what each of these words means in the original Greek.
If you don't know me personally, you don't already know that I am a big-time nerd when it comes to the original languages of the Bible. When a sermon or Bible study includes the phrase, "This word in the original Greek actually means...." I get really excited! I understand that not everyone shares my enthusiasm, so I'll try to make sure this isn't boring!
The first word in the list of qualities in 1 Timothy 3:11 is "dignified."
In the original Greek.... it pretty much still means "dignified." The word in Greek is "semnas" which is the same word Paul used in Philippians 4:8 to say we should meditate on things that are "honorable." Deacon's wives must be dignified and honorable. Some older versions of the Bible translate the word to say "grave."
I have to admit "grave" is my least favorite translation. I hear that and wonder if I'm supposed to be somber or something. I love having a sense of humor, and there are times when if I wasn't allowed to laugh I know for sure I'd break down and cry!
In context, it doesn't sound like those of us who love to make a joke and crack people up every now and then have anything to worry about- thank goodness, it's not that kind of grave. In my understanding, the translation that says "grave" intends to suggest that we should be women who take things seriously when they need to be taken seriously. Certain spiritual matters are a serious thing indeed, especially matters of salvation. We must not take those things lightly.
To act in a dignified way, a woman first needs to know she has dignity. We all have dignity as image-bearers of God. We have immense value and worth to Him. We are secured in Jesus Christ when we accept Him as our Lord and Savior. Being dignified means we carry ourselves with a quiet confidence in that security. As we grow in His teachings, we grow in wisdom and maturity. We learn to put away childish things and walk in newness of life. We are in the light as He is in the light, so we walk as children of light and not as children of darkness.
Also, we are sure to treat others with dignity, even when they are at their worst. Jesus had the wisdom to know how to remain blameless even as he reached out to tax collectors, prostitutes, and other sinners so that he could minister to them. My prayer is that I never look down my dignified nose at "the least of these."
An honorable woman shows herself worthy of respect. Just as her deacon-husband has a good reputation inside the church and with outside world (and, um, on Facebook) so should she. We should be ethical and moral in our conduct at all times, (including what we Tweet...) because anyone who has been a deacon's wife for long knows she is being watched. As human beings, we make mistakes, and we aren't perfect. However, as unfair as it may be, as a servant-leader of the church we set an example that people will follow.
Sometimes I hate this part, because I don't like being in a "fish-bowl," as our pastor once explained it. I'm going to mess up at some point, and I'm sure that failure will be pointed out to me by some offended party. I may be tempted to harden my heart towards that person and say, "I am just going to do whatever I want, because I'll never make everyone happy, anyway!" but this is not the way. It's true we will never be able to please everyone, but I doubt seriously God intends us to write off anyone who disagrees with us.
Colossians 3:23 says, "Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men." Ephesians 6:7 echoes this command. It means we always do our best, and always do what we know is right, but we do it for God's approval, not another person's. When we stumble, we just admit our mistakes and make it right. The Lord will see the motivation of our heart, and praise us for trying again. And don't forget, an apology to a hurt person can go a LONG WAY!
That is exactly what being "honorable" is all about. People will see it when you try your best to live in a dignified and honorable way, but more importantly, God will see it.
Proverbs 24:16 "For though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again..."
1 Timothy 3:11
I'm going to take a few blog posts to break this verse down. My plan is to fully meditate on each quality I must have as a deacon's wife in order to grow in each of these areas. To start, I am going to make sure I fully understand what each of these words means in the original Greek.
If you don't know me personally, you don't already know that I am a big-time nerd when it comes to the original languages of the Bible. When a sermon or Bible study includes the phrase, "This word in the original Greek actually means...." I get really excited! I understand that not everyone shares my enthusiasm, so I'll try to make sure this isn't boring!
The first word in the list of qualities in 1 Timothy 3:11 is "dignified."
In the original Greek.... it pretty much still means "dignified." The word in Greek is "semnas" which is the same word Paul used in Philippians 4:8 to say we should meditate on things that are "honorable." Deacon's wives must be dignified and honorable. Some older versions of the Bible translate the word to say "grave."
I have to admit "grave" is my least favorite translation. I hear that and wonder if I'm supposed to be somber or something. I love having a sense of humor, and there are times when if I wasn't allowed to laugh I know for sure I'd break down and cry!
In context, it doesn't sound like those of us who love to make a joke and crack people up every now and then have anything to worry about- thank goodness, it's not that kind of grave. In my understanding, the translation that says "grave" intends to suggest that we should be women who take things seriously when they need to be taken seriously. Certain spiritual matters are a serious thing indeed, especially matters of salvation. We must not take those things lightly.
To act in a dignified way, a woman first needs to know she has dignity. We all have dignity as image-bearers of God. We have immense value and worth to Him. We are secured in Jesus Christ when we accept Him as our Lord and Savior. Being dignified means we carry ourselves with a quiet confidence in that security. As we grow in His teachings, we grow in wisdom and maturity. We learn to put away childish things and walk in newness of life. We are in the light as He is in the light, so we walk as children of light and not as children of darkness.
Also, we are sure to treat others with dignity, even when they are at their worst. Jesus had the wisdom to know how to remain blameless even as he reached out to tax collectors, prostitutes, and other sinners so that he could minister to them. My prayer is that I never look down my dignified nose at "the least of these."
An honorable woman shows herself worthy of respect. Just as her deacon-husband has a good reputation inside the church and with outside world (and, um, on Facebook) so should she. We should be ethical and moral in our conduct at all times, (including what we Tweet...) because anyone who has been a deacon's wife for long knows she is being watched. As human beings, we make mistakes, and we aren't perfect. However, as unfair as it may be, as a servant-leader of the church we set an example that people will follow.
Sometimes I hate this part, because I don't like being in a "fish-bowl," as our pastor once explained it. I'm going to mess up at some point, and I'm sure that failure will be pointed out to me by some offended party. I may be tempted to harden my heart towards that person and say, "I am just going to do whatever I want, because I'll never make everyone happy, anyway!" but this is not the way. It's true we will never be able to please everyone, but I doubt seriously God intends us to write off anyone who disagrees with us.
Colossians 3:23 says, "Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men." Ephesians 6:7 echoes this command. It means we always do our best, and always do what we know is right, but we do it for God's approval, not another person's. When we stumble, we just admit our mistakes and make it right. The Lord will see the motivation of our heart, and praise us for trying again. And don't forget, an apology to a hurt person can go a LONG WAY!
That is exactly what being "honorable" is all about. People will see it when you try your best to live in a dignified and honorable way, but more importantly, God will see it.
Proverbs 24:16 "For though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again..."
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Catch That Lizard!
While I was sitting outside in the backyard watching my kids play, I spotted a lizard inside of a huge cardboard box we have. I said, "Look! It's a lizard!" and they came running.
I was unsure if Hope, my oldest, could catch it or not, but I knew she'd love to try. My 2- and 3-year olds gathered around the box as my 5-year-old began her hunt. It was trapped inside and couldn't climb out out, so Hope could miss him repeatedly and still have another chance to try. However, the box was just big enough that she couldn't reach all the way across it, which allowed the lizard to continue escaping her.
Eventually, she asked the question that I knew was coming.
"Mommy, will you catch it?"
I knew I could catch this little guy if I wanted to, so I told her I'd try. But, the more I tried to chase the critter down the more I realized I had absolutely no desire to touch the thing at all.
I wondered what on earth happened to me between childhood and motherhood that changed me from a lizard-catching, mud-digging, bug-holding little girl into a squeamish, squealing, chicken of a woman. I tried to suck it up, Mom up, and close my hand around it just to make my kids happy, but I couldn't make myself do it.
After several "tries" I told the kids the they'd have to catch it themselves.
Hope continued to chase it, and as I watched her determination I pondered my lack of it. I wanted to catch it for them, didn't I? Well, deep down I obviously didn't. I'd see exactly what I needed to do to catch it, I'd decide a course of action, then I'd go for it...but the moment I'd have my hand over it, I'd flinch and pull my hand back while I got the heeby-jeebies.
I wondered about my recent prayers. I've been asking God for answers and closure to some very deep struggles of mine. I've been wondering why He will not show me. I realized, laughing, that the answer God has for my struggles is a lizard.
Um... Well, okay, it's LIKE a lizard.
Apparently, I don't really want God's answer. I have a specific answer I am looking for and a path I've already decided I'd like to follow. I ask God all the time to help me, but what I mean is that I want Him to help me succeed in doing things MY way, not His. God has showed me the path he intends me to walk- a path through the valley, not around it.
I have been looking for a butterfly and praying, "Lord, I am seeking Your will!"
And then... Behold, a lizard.
"Father, that's not exactly what I want to strive toward and chase after..."
It occurred to me that I have a choice. I can either open my heart and trust that God knows best and follow Him, or I can harden my heart and stomp my feet and keep trying to chase after whatever I think will make life go MY way. When I realized God may never answer my question of "Why?" and that healing may not happen the way I have hoped, disappointment and fear flooded my heart.
Then again, I know how miserable I'd end up if I hardened my heart to God. Past experience has showed me how miserable it is to try to shut Him out. I also wondered how many people I would hurt if I didn't open my heart to God and trust Him, but instead allowed myself to become bitter.
Bitterness and hardening of heart produce bitter, hard people. I don't want that kind of Mommy for my four little bug-chasing, mud-digging, lizard-chasers.
I decided that I am going to trust what I do know about who Jesus Christ is more than I am going to worry about what I don't know about my past or my future.
If we will seek God through our disappointments, we will learn that He knows and loves His children. He knows us better than we knows ourselves. He knows that the only fulfillment there is to our deepest heart's cry is for us to chase after HIM. He loves us too much to allow us to continue searching for answers and chasing after things that aren't from Him. If He didn't stop us, we'd end up chasing things that would destroy us and break our fellowship with Him.
God has called us to do something, equipped us to do it, and put it in front of us in plain sight- but what if we still just aren't sure about it? What is stopping us from forsaking the things we want to strive after, and following His plan for our lives?
I think the answer comes down to faith and trust in who we know Him to be.
Do we believe that Jesus is who He said He is?
Do we believe all things work together for our good if we love Him?
Do we believe He loves us?
Do we believe that if we lay our will down to die, and take up our cross and follow Jesus, that He will walk beside us and lead us to a better place than we would've ended up on our own?
His ways are above our ways, and He loves us with perfect love. All things work together for the good of those who love God. He will meet our true needs and provide for us, and He will fulfill the deepest longing of our hearts. The only problem is this-
Do we truly believe Him?
We have to be "ALL IN" with Jesus. You either believe Him, or you don't. You either follow Him, or you don't.
If you don't put into practice what you say you believe then deep down, you don't really believe it.
I might have said I wanted to catch that lizard but deep down, I really didn't.
Oh, and just in case you were wondering, Hope finally caught the lizard. She carried the poor thing around by the tail until Eden (my 3-year-old) finally convinced her for a turn to hold it.
She could hardly get hold of him before she squealed and let him go...
(Isaiah 55:8, Romans 8:28, 1 John 4:18, Luke 9:23, Luke 17:33)
I was unsure if Hope, my oldest, could catch it or not, but I knew she'd love to try. My 2- and 3-year olds gathered around the box as my 5-year-old began her hunt. It was trapped inside and couldn't climb out out, so Hope could miss him repeatedly and still have another chance to try. However, the box was just big enough that she couldn't reach all the way across it, which allowed the lizard to continue escaping her.
Eventually, she asked the question that I knew was coming.
"Mommy, will you catch it?"
I knew I could catch this little guy if I wanted to, so I told her I'd try. But, the more I tried to chase the critter down the more I realized I had absolutely no desire to touch the thing at all.
I wondered what on earth happened to me between childhood and motherhood that changed me from a lizard-catching, mud-digging, bug-holding little girl into a squeamish, squealing, chicken of a woman. I tried to suck it up, Mom up, and close my hand around it just to make my kids happy, but I couldn't make myself do it.
After several "tries" I told the kids the they'd have to catch it themselves.
Hope continued to chase it, and as I watched her determination I pondered my lack of it. I wanted to catch it for them, didn't I? Well, deep down I obviously didn't. I'd see exactly what I needed to do to catch it, I'd decide a course of action, then I'd go for it...but the moment I'd have my hand over it, I'd flinch and pull my hand back while I got the heeby-jeebies.
I wondered about my recent prayers. I've been asking God for answers and closure to some very deep struggles of mine. I've been wondering why He will not show me. I realized, laughing, that the answer God has for my struggles is a lizard.
Um... Well, okay, it's LIKE a lizard.
Apparently, I don't really want God's answer. I have a specific answer I am looking for and a path I've already decided I'd like to follow. I ask God all the time to help me, but what I mean is that I want Him to help me succeed in doing things MY way, not His. God has showed me the path he intends me to walk- a path through the valley, not around it.
I have been looking for a butterfly and praying, "Lord, I am seeking Your will!"
And then... Behold, a lizard.
"Father, that's not exactly what I want to strive toward and chase after..."
It occurred to me that I have a choice. I can either open my heart and trust that God knows best and follow Him, or I can harden my heart and stomp my feet and keep trying to chase after whatever I think will make life go MY way. When I realized God may never answer my question of "Why?" and that healing may not happen the way I have hoped, disappointment and fear flooded my heart.
Then again, I know how miserable I'd end up if I hardened my heart to God. Past experience has showed me how miserable it is to try to shut Him out. I also wondered how many people I would hurt if I didn't open my heart to God and trust Him, but instead allowed myself to become bitter.
Bitterness and hardening of heart produce bitter, hard people. I don't want that kind of Mommy for my four little bug-chasing, mud-digging, lizard-chasers.
I decided that I am going to trust what I do know about who Jesus Christ is more than I am going to worry about what I don't know about my past or my future.
If we will seek God through our disappointments, we will learn that He knows and loves His children. He knows us better than we knows ourselves. He knows that the only fulfillment there is to our deepest heart's cry is for us to chase after HIM. He loves us too much to allow us to continue searching for answers and chasing after things that aren't from Him. If He didn't stop us, we'd end up chasing things that would destroy us and break our fellowship with Him.
God has called us to do something, equipped us to do it, and put it in front of us in plain sight- but what if we still just aren't sure about it? What is stopping us from forsaking the things we want to strive after, and following His plan for our lives?
I think the answer comes down to faith and trust in who we know Him to be.
Do we believe that Jesus is who He said He is?
Do we believe all things work together for our good if we love Him?
Do we believe He loves us?
Do we believe that if we lay our will down to die, and take up our cross and follow Jesus, that He will walk beside us and lead us to a better place than we would've ended up on our own?
His ways are above our ways, and He loves us with perfect love. All things work together for the good of those who love God. He will meet our true needs and provide for us, and He will fulfill the deepest longing of our hearts. The only problem is this-
Do we truly believe Him?
We have to be "ALL IN" with Jesus. You either believe Him, or you don't. You either follow Him, or you don't.
If you don't put into practice what you say you believe then deep down, you don't really believe it.
I might have said I wanted to catch that lizard but deep down, I really didn't.
Oh, and just in case you were wondering, Hope finally caught the lizard. She carried the poor thing around by the tail until Eden (my 3-year-old) finally convinced her for a turn to hold it.
She could hardly get hold of him before she squealed and let him go...
(Isaiah 55:8, Romans 8:28, 1 John 4:18, Luke 9:23, Luke 17:33)
Saturday, February 9, 2013
El Roi, The God Who Sees
"The secret things belong to the Lord..."
Deuteronomy 29:29
"Man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks on the heart."
1 Samuel 16:7
♥ God knows our intentions. God knows our desires.
It does not matter what they think they see, what they think they know. God truly does know what you meant. God truly does know the reason you did or said something.
"He said to them, 'You are the ones who justify yourselves in the eyes of others, but God knows your hearts. What people value highly is detestable in God’s sight.' "
Luke 16:15
♥ Thank You, for being El Roi.
The God Who Sees.♥
Deuteronomy 29:29
"Man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks on the heart."
1 Samuel 16:7
♥ God knows our intentions. God knows our desires.
It does not matter what they think they see, what they think they know. God truly does know what you meant. God truly does know the reason you did or said something.
"He said to them, 'You are the ones who justify yourselves in the eyes of others, but God knows your hearts. What people value highly is detestable in God’s sight.' "
Luke 16:15
♥ Thank You, for being El Roi.
The God Who Sees.♥
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